In my defence, I finished all my work before pursuing my leisure activities, actitivies that include stalking blogs, updating mine, reading articles and comics. And so I discovered, I could sign into Msn, but can't access my hotmail nor my messenger. Kinda defeats the purpose of signing in though.
Anyhow, comics. I just realized that, there are online comics that I could view at http://www.msn.com/. Comics such as Doonesbury are a real relief as it pokes fun at practically everything. Comics such as Adam takes you into the life of the average American family.
And I just realized you could read manga too. How awesome is that? Of course, I'ma gonna have to search for a manga less graphic then this.
*Laughs out loud*
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Monday, July 26, 2010
Monday blues
Yet another Monday. I think I'm starting to age prematurely. Reason being, I slept at 10 last night, and managed to be late for work this morning. How awesome is that? In my defence, I was caught in a jam in a stretch of road which normally takes me 15 minutes to clear. Today, it took me more than twice that time.
And so I've drawn a conclusion. Well. A couple of 'em.
- I shouldn't sleep at 2am on weekends, unless I don't have to wake up early the next day.
- Coffee in the morning, is a must. In fact, coffee at least once a day is a must.
- Constant interaction with the computer is bad, really bad. Especially after office hours.
- Procrastination is bad. Or wait. Is it good?
- Smokes seem more and more attractive right now, given my inability to go w/o coffee the whole day.
- Rain, is very much a factor in my inability to leave earlier.
- Food makes me feel nauseous right now.
Ok. That's more than just a couple.
I need a nap. Urgently. Desperately.
And so I've drawn a conclusion. Well. A couple of 'em.
- I shouldn't sleep at 2am on weekends, unless I don't have to wake up early the next day.
- Coffee in the morning, is a must. In fact, coffee at least once a day is a must.
- Constant interaction with the computer is bad, really bad. Especially after office hours.
- Procrastination is bad. Or wait. Is it good?
- Smokes seem more and more attractive right now, given my inability to go w/o coffee the whole day.
- Rain, is very much a factor in my inability to leave earlier.
- Food makes me feel nauseous right now.
Ok. That's more than just a couple.
I need a nap. Urgently. Desperately.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Gun-ner
I was looking at this post and was hit with a wave of nostalgia. I remember when I was younger, I was insane. Literally. I loved to play with Legos but I couldn't follow their instructions to build a ship or airplane or house. Instead, I became my own architect. Technically, the only thing I could build was a house, a simplified version, with 4 walls and a roof. ROFL. But still. I had tons of fun with Legos. They were the background of many of my make-believe stories. As I grew older, my attachment to Legos lessen. Stories now played in my head, instead of being acted out.
1 fine day, I saw this action flick. Acting on an inspiration, I took out my Legos set, blew the dust off, and set out to construct my own weapon. The results? An awesome (by my standards then) gun. It would never run out of ammo, and could shoot rays of plasma too. Not to mention, it was personalized so that only my fingerprint would activate the gun. Anyone other then me wouldn't be able to fire it. And when it was done, I would proudly wave about my gun and pretend to be some secret agent or spy or perhaps even a crime lord.
Ah. The joys of my youth.
I remember plotting out a blueprint, of what my house ought to be like, with secret panels, escape panels, hidden buttons/switches, secret rooms... The whole lot. Blame it on the tv shows. At one stage, I would be a crime lord; at times, I would be a fictional character in a literal world that doesn't belong to me. Always though, I would play the role of a guy. Be it, crime lord, superstar, world athlete, racer... I was always the one who got the girl. *grins*
I miss those days, when I was young, innocent, carefree and amusingly naive. Human nature, not to realize what you have, till you've lost it. Human nature too, to let the best things in life past us by. Even more so, when you realize that, it's always too late when you come to a realization. Youth is something we should treasure, despite however it might turn out. There would always be a glimmer of light even in the bleakest day.
On a side note. Lucy Diamond in a tank top waving a gun. Now THAT, is what dreams are made of. This doesn't really do her any justice, but still, a good enough picture.
Google Jordana Brewster.
You know you want to.
1 fine day, I saw this action flick. Acting on an inspiration, I took out my Legos set, blew the dust off, and set out to construct my own weapon. The results? An awesome (by my standards then) gun. It would never run out of ammo, and could shoot rays of plasma too. Not to mention, it was personalized so that only my fingerprint would activate the gun. Anyone other then me wouldn't be able to fire it. And when it was done, I would proudly wave about my gun and pretend to be some secret agent or spy or perhaps even a crime lord.
Ah. The joys of my youth.
I remember plotting out a blueprint, of what my house ought to be like, with secret panels, escape panels, hidden buttons/switches, secret rooms... The whole lot. Blame it on the tv shows. At one stage, I would be a crime lord; at times, I would be a fictional character in a literal world that doesn't belong to me. Always though, I would play the role of a guy. Be it, crime lord, superstar, world athlete, racer... I was always the one who got the girl. *grins*
I miss those days, when I was young, innocent, carefree and amusingly naive. Human nature, not to realize what you have, till you've lost it. Human nature too, to let the best things in life past us by. Even more so, when you realize that, it's always too late when you come to a realization. Youth is something we should treasure, despite however it might turn out. There would always be a glimmer of light even in the bleakest day.
On a side note. Lucy Diamond in a tank top waving a gun. Now THAT, is what dreams are made of. This doesn't really do her any justice, but still, a good enough picture.
Google Jordana Brewster.
You know you want to.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Determination
"To err is human, to forgive divine."
"And after all, what is a lie? 'Tis but the truth in a masquerade."
"Act well your part: there all the honor lies. "
"On wrongs swift vengeance waits."
"Praise undeserved, is satire in disguise."
"Teach me to feel another's woe, to hide the fault I see, that mercy I to others show, that mercy show to me."
"Tis but a part we see, and not a whole."
"To be angry is to revenge the faults of others on ourselves."
"Woman's at best a contradiction still."
This post is dedicated to Alexander Pope, who was one of the greatest poets of his time. His words hold much truth and wisdom, even in today's world, whereby technology rules. At heart, despite how advance we are in every sense, we are but human, a flawed product. To be the best we can be, minimizing our weaknesses, our shortcomings and maximizing our strengths, that should be our goal.
I want to get my confirmation as soon as I can. I want to be more than what I am today tomorrow. I want to change who I am to be what I can and want to be.
Wish me luck.
"And after all, what is a lie? 'Tis but the truth in a masquerade."
"Act well your part: there all the honor lies. "
"On wrongs swift vengeance waits."
"Praise undeserved, is satire in disguise."
"Teach me to feel another's woe, to hide the fault I see, that mercy I to others show, that mercy show to me."
"Tis but a part we see, and not a whole."
"To be angry is to revenge the faults of others on ourselves."
"Woman's at best a contradiction still."
This post is dedicated to Alexander Pope, who was one of the greatest poets of his time. His words hold much truth and wisdom, even in today's world, whereby technology rules. At heart, despite how advance we are in every sense, we are but human, a flawed product. To be the best we can be, minimizing our weaknesses, our shortcomings and maximizing our strengths, that should be our goal.
I want to get my confirmation as soon as I can. I want to be more than what I am today tomorrow. I want to change who I am to be what I can and want to be.
Wish me luck.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Secondhand Serenade - Something More
I lie awake again, my bodies feeling paralysed
I can’t remember when
I didn’t live through this disguise
The words you said to me
They couldn’t set me free
Im stuck here in this life i didn’t ask for
There must be something more,
Do we know what we’re fighting for?
Breathe in breathe out
And all these masks we wore
We never knew what we had in store
Breathe in breathe out
The storm is rolling in
The thunders loud it hurts my ears
Im paying for my sins
And its gunna rain for years and years
I fooled everyone and now what will i become?
I have to start this over
I have to start this over
There must be something more,
Do we know what we’re fighting for?
Breathe in breathe out
And all these masks we wore
We never knew what we had in store
emp3musicdownload.blogspot.com
Breathe in breathe out
I fooled everyone and now what will i become?
I have to start this over
I have to start this over
There must be something more,
Do we know what we’re fighting for?
Breathe in breathe out
And all these masks we wore
We never knew what we had in store
Breathe in breathe out
There must be something more
Breathe in breathe out
There must be something more
I can’t remember when
I didn’t live through this disguise
The words you said to me
They couldn’t set me free
Im stuck here in this life i didn’t ask for
There must be something more,
Do we know what we’re fighting for?
Breathe in breathe out
And all these masks we wore
We never knew what we had in store
Breathe in breathe out
The storm is rolling in
The thunders loud it hurts my ears
Im paying for my sins
And its gunna rain for years and years
I fooled everyone and now what will i become?
I have to start this over
I have to start this over
There must be something more,
Do we know what we’re fighting for?
Breathe in breathe out
And all these masks we wore
We never knew what we had in store
emp3musicdownload.blogspot.com
Breathe in breathe out
I fooled everyone and now what will i become?
I have to start this over
I have to start this over
There must be something more,
Do we know what we’re fighting for?
Breathe in breathe out
And all these masks we wore
We never knew what we had in store
Breathe in breathe out
There must be something more
Breathe in breathe out
There must be something more
Dreams
I dreamt. I dreamt of a normal everyday life, the difference being you and Dorion are here. I dreamt, that you and I were resting in the room, 'cause we had a dinner to attend later. I woke up feeling a lil hungry, and grandma baked bread, a whole variety of it, much like a small scale bakery. I chose a sausage roll, which had some mayo on it. I stepped out the room and saw Dorion being doted upon by mom and grandma. I offered him a bite. He took a mouthful and dad told me to give him some milk before he ate the bread or else he might vomit (how does this make sense?). So I told him to yell for you if he felt like vomitting. He said ok. I went to get him a cup of milk. Then I woke up.
I remember feeling a certain sense of loss when I woke up. A lil disorientated. It's been so long, since I last dreamt of you, and my 1st time dreaming of him. I guess, I miss you both, more than I realize. I remember hugging my boy all the time. =(
I remember feeling a certain sense of loss when I woke up. A lil disorientated. It's been so long, since I last dreamt of you, and my 1st time dreaming of him. I guess, I miss you both, more than I realize. I remember hugging my boy all the time. =(
Monday, July 19, 2010
untitled
She told me, I should get sunnies. Reason being, that people would fall in love with me the moment they look into my eyes. *Laughs* How cute.
I miss her, every minute of every day that my mind is not occupied. She's central in all my fantasies, my desires, my dreams, my make-believe world. Hard, being apart this way. Doubly hard, not being able to talk everyday. Triply hard, when things get tough and strength of will gets tested. I wish, she could come for my convocation. I wish, she could just come over, whenever. I actually asked her to come over when she asked me what I wanted as a gift for doing well for exams. (I got 3D 1C) Sadly, it couldn't be anytime soon. I asked for Xmas, and she said she'll try. But idk. Somehow, it feels like the odds are not in my favor. Or perhaps she'll actually come this time.
I... It feels like I'm asking for the moon, the earth, the sun, the entire universe. Feels like I'm mooning after a phantom, an illustration, a figment of my imagination. Am I just dreaming? I miss my baby. *pouts* Funnily enough, this post is not meant to be emo, yet, it seems to be heading that way. Doesn't it? I feel like, I'm asking for more than she can/could/want to give. Do I? Perhaps I do.
She's really amazing. Life would be so much better if she was here. She could make me smile just like that, without needing much effort. Just being able to hear her voice, hear her laughter, is emough to put a smile on my face. When we talk, it feels like the rest of the world just falls apart, into the background. She brightens up my day and leaves me in a good mood for the rest of the day. Just her. Her and my kid. Family. That's all I want, for Xmas.
Is it too early to want a Xmas gift?
*Editted*
My castle in the air, is that of you me and a family. To be able to go home to hugs and kisses, and welcoming embraces and kids having fun in the background. That's my castle in the air. You, me a family.
I miss her, every minute of every day that my mind is not occupied. She's central in all my fantasies, my desires, my dreams, my make-believe world. Hard, being apart this way. Doubly hard, not being able to talk everyday. Triply hard, when things get tough and strength of will gets tested. I wish, she could come for my convocation. I wish, she could just come over, whenever. I actually asked her to come over when she asked me what I wanted as a gift for doing well for exams. (I got 3D 1C) Sadly, it couldn't be anytime soon. I asked for Xmas, and she said she'll try. But idk. Somehow, it feels like the odds are not in my favor. Or perhaps she'll actually come this time.
I... It feels like I'm asking for the moon, the earth, the sun, the entire universe. Feels like I'm mooning after a phantom, an illustration, a figment of my imagination. Am I just dreaming? I miss my baby. *pouts* Funnily enough, this post is not meant to be emo, yet, it seems to be heading that way. Doesn't it? I feel like, I'm asking for more than she can/could/want to give. Do I? Perhaps I do.
She's really amazing. Life would be so much better if she was here. She could make me smile just like that, without needing much effort. Just being able to hear her voice, hear her laughter, is emough to put a smile on my face. When we talk, it feels like the rest of the world just falls apart, into the background. She brightens up my day and leaves me in a good mood for the rest of the day. Just her. Her and my kid. Family. That's all I want, for Xmas.
Is it too early to want a Xmas gift?
*Editted*
My castle in the air, is that of you me and a family. To be able to go home to hugs and kisses, and welcoming embraces and kids having fun in the background. That's my castle in the air. You, me a family.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
150710
OUTDATED!
OMG!
Ok. Bit hysterical there. Forgive me. I was actually talking about me being outdated about the latest music hits. I've been so out of it, I don't even have songs like, 'Nothing On You', 'Need You Now', 'Never Knew I Needed', 'The Only Exception' and so many more. Like seriously, I'm so out of it. I'm so going to download the latest Secondhand Serenade album. I'm like this huge fan and the music is just so awesome. I think I can practically sing all their songs.
On another note, I think my emotions are going haywire. You're going to think I'm nuts (not that I'm not) but it's been ages since I last talked to her. (I sound like a broken down record player. Even I'm disgusting myself, so you peeps can just skip this paragraph or so) Sigh. I dunno. Let's skip this. Or rather let's just end this here.
On an interesting note. My 'teacher' has a tattoo around his arm. Awesome
OMG!
Ok. Bit hysterical there. Forgive me. I was actually talking about me being outdated about the latest music hits. I've been so out of it, I don't even have songs like, 'Nothing On You', 'Need You Now', 'Never Knew I Needed', 'The Only Exception' and so many more. Like seriously, I'm so out of it. I'm so going to download the latest Secondhand Serenade album. I'm like this huge fan and the music is just so awesome. I think I can practically sing all their songs.
On another note, I think my emotions are going haywire. You're going to think I'm nuts (not that I'm not) but it's been ages since I last talked to her. (I sound like a broken down record player. Even I'm disgusting myself, so you peeps can just skip this paragraph or so) Sigh. I dunno. Let's skip this. Or rather let's just end this here.
On an interesting note. My 'teacher' has a tattoo around his arm. Awesome
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
XXX: ...... and after that, turn left and there you are.
Me: Wow. That's fast!
XXX: Yeah, but it's rm7 to and fro.
Me: Hahaha. Why'd you wanna go there for?
XXX: 'kao zai'
Me: But you already have a boyfriend.
XXX: So? Not husband.
Me: ........
****************************
Anyway. That was a very =.=" moment, but I guess there's no denying the truth in her words. I mean, you're free to walk around and shop before paying for your purchases right? Well. Unless you personally decide that you're more than satisfied with what you've got, then it becomes a personal choice right?
Anyway. That aside. Gab has taken over teaching me about the system and stuff, so I reckon I'll be getting more work to do. *Cheers* It might sound really weird to you, that I'm actually cheering to get work. Me, whom we all know is as lazy as a well-fed pig. There's really nothing much I can do here at the office if I don't do any work. And since I can't FB, can't MSN, can't FF/FP, I might as well do work and actually earn my keep. (Since my alternative is stalking the newspaper online)
(So far, I've learnt aac/apa/msc/ibc, which is like the tip of the iceberg of my workscope)
Ok. So something kinda jogged my memory. Apparently, boys only mature when they are 20, ie, they can only start to have sex at 20. *rises eyebrow* any younger and they're still 'developing'... lol
Me: Wow. That's fast!
XXX: Yeah, but it's rm7 to and fro.
Me: Hahaha. Why'd you wanna go there for?
XXX: 'kao zai'
Me: But you already have a boyfriend.
XXX: So? Not husband.
Me: ........
****************************
Anyway. That was a very =.=" moment, but I guess there's no denying the truth in her words. I mean, you're free to walk around and shop before paying for your purchases right? Well. Unless you personally decide that you're more than satisfied with what you've got, then it becomes a personal choice right?
Anyway. That aside. Gab has taken over teaching me about the system and stuff, so I reckon I'll be getting more work to do. *Cheers* It might sound really weird to you, that I'm actually cheering to get work. Me, whom we all know is as lazy as a well-fed pig. There's really nothing much I can do here at the office if I don't do any work. And since I can't FB, can't MSN, can't FF/FP, I might as well do work and actually earn my keep. (Since my alternative is stalking the newspaper online)
(So far, I've learnt aac/apa/msc/ibc, which is like the tip of the iceberg of my workscope)
Ok. So something kinda jogged my memory. Apparently, boys only mature when they are 20, ie, they can only start to have sex at 20. *rises eyebrow* any younger and they're still 'developing'... lol
Monday, July 12, 2010
*faints*
I'm starting to think that I really have worms in my stomach. To think that I just had lunch not too long ago. Well, ok. More like, 3 hours ago. Still. This sucks big time. I'm HUNGRY! Damn.
Need You Now - Lady Antebellum
Need You Now Lyrics - Lady Antebellum
Picture perfect memories scattered all around the floor.
Reaching for the phone 'cuz I can't fight it anymore.
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind?
For me it happens all the time.
It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now.
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now.
And I don't know how I can do without.
I just need you now.
Another shot of whiskey, can't stopping looking at the door.
Wishing you'd come sweeping in the way you did before.
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind?
For me it happens all the time.
It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now.
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now.
And I don't know how I can do without.
I just need you now.
Oh whoa
Yes I'd rather hurt than feel nothing at all.
It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now.
And I said I wouldn't call but I'm a little drunk
and I need you now.
Well I don't know how I can do without.
I just need you now
I just need you now.
Oh baby I need you now.
Picture perfect memories scattered all around the floor.
Reaching for the phone 'cuz I can't fight it anymore.
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind?
For me it happens all the time.
It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now.
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now.
And I don't know how I can do without.
I just need you now.
Another shot of whiskey, can't stopping looking at the door.
Wishing you'd come sweeping in the way you did before.
And I wonder if I ever cross your mind?
For me it happens all the time.
It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now.
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now.
And I don't know how I can do without.
I just need you now.
Oh whoa
Yes I'd rather hurt than feel nothing at all.
It's a quarter after one, I'm all alone and I need you now.
And I said I wouldn't call but I'm a little drunk
and I need you now.
Well I don't know how I can do without.
I just need you now
I just need you now.
Oh baby I need you now.
Week 2
Week 2. It's still oh so boring. Meh. I have no idea how to spend my time in the office. I wonder if it's possible I continue writing during office hours. I'm being reduced to doing all my e-learnings now, while waiting for work to do. I can't believe I'm saying this, but I actually WANT work. Wth you're asking? Yeah. It's totally wth. Gah. Boredom settles in.
Thursday, July 08, 2010
Updates!
Ok. So I realized that it's been quite a while since I last posted. April 11 till now, that's like, what, 3 months or so? It's no excuse, but I plead finals, World Cup, Thomas Cup, and whatnot as reasonable distraction. But hey, it really doesn't matter, 'cause this blog aint dead after all. I mean, I'm here now, blogging aint I?
So anyway. Thomas Cup is over, with China winning the Thomas and losing the Uber. That's old news. Right. Carry on. The World Cup 2010 is here, and Finals is but a few days away. The finalists? Netherlands vs Spain. Epic, aint it? The so called top teams, like, Brazil, France, Italy all crashed even before the semis. They say that this World Cup 2010 is the world cup of upsets, and I so have to agree.
Anyway. Here I am, on an awesome Thursday morning, at freaking 8.56am, blogging. Reason being not that I've insommia, but rather 'cause I'm at work. Yeah. You heard me. WORK. Geez. I kinda regret telling my manager that I'm free from 1st July onwards. I haven't even had a break yet! *sadface* And! My other friends are still at home, enjoying themselves, pigging it out, hanging out with friends, watching world cup and whatnot. I missed that Germany vs Spain match this morning. An EPIC. And I missed it! *SIGH*
So yeah. Work. A freshie over here, I couldn't even log on to the computer without needing someone to help me, till late yesterday evening. See? That's why I'm blogging right now. Apparently there's supposed to be this, training/meeting thingy that starts at 9, but, looking around, there aint that many people around, so yeah, some free time to kill.
Work is alright, I guess? Was just stoning around at the office for the past few days, since my seniors/colleagues are all busy busy busy, and they don't really have the time to teach me, except when they have a short break. So basically, I'm just sitting there watching them work, den they'll explain a lil here and there. They're kinda nice, I guess? Well, those that I interacted with. The rest, idk yet. Takes time I guess? I hate that I need time to take up the initiative to talk to people, shy? reserve? cowardice? whatever you want to call it.
I could go on and on and on about work, but I really rather not, especially since I'm @ work. So onward to my personal life. Speaking of which, I realised that I actually missed typing. Idk how my mind works. I'm just weird that way.
**********************************************************************************
2 hours later and this post isn't even ready to be published. Reason being that I just got out of that... thingy. So basically. Now I'm freezing and I'm plain bored, and I'm resorting to blogging as my only entertainment, seeing that they blocked basically all my entertainment sites, from Facebook to Twitter to even fanfics, and let's not even talk about MSN or even Ebuddy. Blocked blocked blocked blocked blocked. Lucky my phone didn't get blocked. Anyway. Think it's pretty much an update on most of my life at the moment. I'm off to 'study' once more! Toodles darlins!
(Damn. I sound a lil........(idk... bimbotic? gay?)
So anyway. Thomas Cup is over, with China winning the Thomas and losing the Uber. That's old news. Right. Carry on. The World Cup 2010 is here, and Finals is but a few days away. The finalists? Netherlands vs Spain. Epic, aint it? The so called top teams, like, Brazil, France, Italy all crashed even before the semis. They say that this World Cup 2010 is the world cup of upsets, and I so have to agree.
Anyway. Here I am, on an awesome Thursday morning, at freaking 8.56am, blogging. Reason being not that I've insommia, but rather 'cause I'm at work. Yeah. You heard me. WORK. Geez. I kinda regret telling my manager that I'm free from 1st July onwards. I haven't even had a break yet! *sadface* And! My other friends are still at home, enjoying themselves, pigging it out, hanging out with friends, watching world cup and whatnot. I missed that Germany vs Spain match this morning. An EPIC. And I missed it! *SIGH*
So yeah. Work. A freshie over here, I couldn't even log on to the computer without needing someone to help me, till late yesterday evening. See? That's why I'm blogging right now. Apparently there's supposed to be this, training/meeting thingy that starts at 9, but, looking around, there aint that many people around, so yeah, some free time to kill.
Work is alright, I guess? Was just stoning around at the office for the past few days, since my seniors/colleagues are all busy busy busy, and they don't really have the time to teach me, except when they have a short break. So basically, I'm just sitting there watching them work, den they'll explain a lil here and there. They're kinda nice, I guess? Well, those that I interacted with. The rest, idk yet. Takes time I guess? I hate that I need time to take up the initiative to talk to people, shy? reserve? cowardice? whatever you want to call it.
I could go on and on and on about work, but I really rather not, especially since I'm @ work. So onward to my personal life. Speaking of which, I realised that I actually missed typing. Idk how my mind works. I'm just weird that way.
**********************************************************************************
2 hours later and this post isn't even ready to be published. Reason being that I just got out of that... thingy. So basically. Now I'm freezing and I'm plain bored, and I'm resorting to blogging as my only entertainment, seeing that they blocked basically all my entertainment sites, from Facebook to Twitter to even fanfics, and let's not even talk about MSN or even Ebuddy. Blocked blocked blocked blocked blocked. Lucky my phone didn't get blocked. Anyway. Think it's pretty much an update on most of my life at the moment. I'm off to 'study' once more! Toodles darlins!
(Damn. I sound a lil........(idk... bimbotic? gay?)